Back to School Resolutions

As most teachers know, and anyone who has a relationship with a teacher, the beginning of a new school year is more like New Years than January 1st. While at dinner with some fellow teachers we began discussing "back to school resolutions." Some of them were career oriented, but a lot were personal.

{1. We can't do this all the time, but I want to make a conscious effort to buy more organic.  > 2. I've found myself very passionate about climate change, but I'm not doing anything about it. I'm going to change that. > 3. Coming from a long history of Dementia & Alzheimer's this should be a no brainer. } 

A Roman Holiday

One of my favorite movies of all time!

Visions of Valentine's Danced in Their Heads.

I wish I had time to do all of the wonderful ideas, decorations, and eats I'm seeing for St. Valentine's Day. Alas, I don't have much time, but these pictures sure are lovely.

Living on Purpose

"You are the salt of the earth...the light of the world. A city on a hill."


Matthew 5:13,14


Like most people I have been thinking about how 2012 will be different, or "New Year Resolutions", and the sermon at church this morning made me positive of my decision.

As a whole I want to improve my habits pertaining to my Mind, Body, & Soul.

M: I aspire to gain more knowledge of the person of God. I feel I often ignore who He really is, and instead think of Him how I want Him to be.

B: I aspire to eat more healthfully and exercise 6 days a week. After all- the body I have is a gift and a temple for the Holy Spirit


S: I aspire to actively pursue living out my purpose: being the salt of the earth. In order to do this I have got to study His word better and more deeply. I also want to take no day and no interaction lightly. In 2012 I want to...

Live on Purpose.

When there Aren't Words

I really don't have much to say. As most of you know my dearest friend has suffered an unthinkable loss. It is the most heart breaking experience of my life. She is far away, and I can't get to her any time soon. I can't be there to hold her hand, to hug her, to kiss her forehead, to cry with her. Her heart is broken and mine is aching constantly with hers. These words can not begin to express the pain I feel for her. When there aren't words that I as a human can think to pray for her, the Holy Spirit is interceding on my behalf.

 In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. ²⁷ And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.


Romans 8:26,27

What I'm Reading

These are the titles I am reading as of late. One thing I am really loving about post college life is reading for pleasure. I am also really enjoying reading multiple books at a time. It's nice to have space in my noggin to handle this. 

This is a must read for teachers. Not that I am way experienced or trained, but it puts thing in ways I would have never thought.

I have been reading this one since right after we got married. I guess I shouldn't say anything else, but I highly suggest it! 

I just got this one at the Library. I have seen it at Anthro several times, and plan on buying it when I finish.  It is too fun and too cute. 

I have had a French fetish all my life (my mother is to thank), and this book is right up my ally. 

Believe or not, I am still reading this. I posted about it one year ago exactly. I can't really explain why, but this is a heavy book for me. It stirs up insecurities I didn't even know I had, and makes me deal with them. I have re-read most of the chapters about three times. 

In my opinion you must give every single one of these diverse books a try. You won't be sorry.

2 Timothy 1:7

"For God did not give us a spirit of fearfulness; but of power, love, and self control"

God is doing a miracle in our midsts right now, and Satan is just pounding me with lies of fear. I'm not ready to talk about it just yet because everything is not finalized, but I am overjoyed. I have been whispering this verse to myself all day. I am also being reminded of this verse: "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him" 1 John 3:1. I love the translation of the the word lavished. What a great word. He does lavish us. To Lavish: Bestow something in generous or extravagant quantities upon.

Lately I have really been missing leading worship. I want to sing this song with my husband:

"To live would be an awfully big adventure" J.M. Barrie

I have been reminiscing a lot the past few days. Not in an 'I'm sad' way, but in a 'look how far we have come' way. When I think upon the changes I have undergone since Joe and I began dating it is humbling and exciting. Of course I was still a bit of a child when it all started... and now (do I dare say it) I am an adult. ? Maybe... almost. This picture is in front of the Peter Pan statue in London (hence the quote). It is perhaps one of my most favorite spots on earth. I loved the disney movie Peter Pan as a child, and it was a dream come true to finally see this statue. (I first saw with my mom 3 years prior to this pic). The story of Peter Pan is really quite right. We as christians should never grow out of our child-like faith in Christ. While it is not logical, or explainable it is true. Praise the Lord, our God is mighty to save. It is going to be even more fantastical to stand in His presence, than my wildest child hood fantasies.

This weekend I made my new trek home down I-10. It wasn't so bad. Sealy to home was the worst part. Friday my parents had the day off for "ice", so my dad enjoyed watching the extended version of The Return of the King. A very us activity. I got to shop with my mom, aunt, and Oksana, and hang with the UB and Phil. It was great. Saturday my mom(s) and I got to enjoy being ladies who brunch. It was delightful. One of my favorite weekends to date.

My mom comes into town today for the rest of the week, and my most favorite comes home on friday for the weekend! I'm counting the hours.

My (Our) Exodus

This past Sunday we attended Joe's childhood church, and it was so good to be in the house of the Lord with our family. The pastor's message began with a verse out of Exodus. I didn't catch the address, just the text. I was immediately convicted to begin reading Exodus. After all, we are in a kind of Exodus. Whether or not we actually leave College Station, the perfect plan we had envisioned for January isn't happening. Life is about to drastically change. Like the Israelites, there are some days that I moan and grumble to God: "This is not how I thought this would go..." "We had plans...". You know the drill. I had planned on starting my journey through Exodus on Monday, but I allowed myself to become distracted. I really want to experience the growth that I know God has for me in Exodus, so I am going to keep myself accountable to you. Whoever you are. I am going to write everyday (I hope- even if it's just a verse) and document this journey through our blog.

Exodus 1-2

In the first chapter of Exodus the author describes the forgetfulness of the Egyptians: v8. "Then a new king, who did not know about Joesph..." While the Egyptians were a pagan culture, I still feel the need to parallel them with myself. How often I forget the faithfulness of the Lord. I allow my thoughts to wander and worry and therefore cheat myself out of peace. Again this week Joe and I experienced the awesome faithfulness of God: Joe was only given work for part of November, but because of the full-time hours he did work, he was payed for 3/4 time for the whole month. Basically more money than we expected. We got to buy something that we had been saving for. No that doesn't sound super religious, but we were able to do something and get to enjoy something really fun.

In chapter two we meet Moses. Of course most of us know his mother trusted God to protect her son; however, God not only spared her son, but provided a way for her to raise him. Even now I have no idea where we will call home in about a month, but I know the Lord knows. I hope I choose to trust in that, rather than wandering and worrying.

Ah! mio sogno! Oh, My Dream!

Well, I survived! Saturday was my senior recital, and I'm pretty happy with the way it went. Of course I'm still in the digesting mode- thinking about what I would do differently etc. but for the most part I'm happy. It was great to be with family- but now I miss them! Good thing thanksgiving is NEXT WEEK!!! The whole experience was a bit surreal. I can't believe it's over, done. The rest of my semester should be pretty much "gravy". A few assignments here and there, but for the most part- Je fini! 3 weeks of classes left and a little less than 5 weeks till graduation! Wow! Here are some pictures from Saturday.

Change

Happy Monday! There is no rhyme or reason for this photo, just for giggles. I have found myself in a bit of a funk this morning. Nothing in particular, just a little off. So, I thought this photo would make me smile- it did.

Last night I was reading out of the devotional book "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young (really great little read), the devo was on anxiety and she wrote something like this "Do not linger too long in the future, for it allows little mushrooms of anxiety to sprout... but rather let God write your fantasies..." or something. Ugg straight to the heart, this is so hard for me; but, this is absolutely true. The future is completely unknown and if I allow myself to 'linger' there I become quite down- change.

Something I was really looking forward to has changed. It's not going to be how I thought it was- change.

Lately the conversations I have had with my mom have been serious- things are changing.

Everything I know is changing, not for the worse, but changing none the less. I feel like I am being pushed through a hole that I don't quite fit through, my emotions are being pinched, pulled, and spread. Today I hate it. Today bitterness is on the tip of my tongue, and a part of me wants to allow it to consume me. I need time to digest, but I have no time. I need to cry, but the tears don't come. Today I am broken; BUT, Christ has overcome, He is victorious over death, He holds me in His hand, HE ALONE IS FAITHFUL! He is interceding on my behalf to the Father. He is steadfast, & UNCHANGING. Because of this I choose to rejoice.

Isaiah 6:8

This blog post has been brewing inside of me. So, I thought it was time to pour. It makes me a bit nervous, because these are my inner, most venerable thoughts; however, it is part of my story. Isaiah 6:8 says, "I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send, who will go for me?' and I said 'Here am I, send me!". The summer of 2002 this became my 'life verse'. My dad a year before went on his first mission trip to Latvia, and to say he came back a different man would be an understatement. My family was called to Latvia, and my dad was the first on God told. I wouldn't get the message until the next summer. My dad took another trip to Latvia, and this time our church was able to bring back a few Latvians for one month. I got the opportunity to serve with all of these Latvians on a mission trip to San Marcos. On that trip I really felt God calling me to missions, specifically to Latvia. I don't know how or why, but I knew it in my gut. Maybe it was the slight glimpse I got of this wonderful country. I was in love. Immediately we were planning our trip in 2003. My mom was the last to come around. Being the caring, loving mom she is, it worried her a bit. However, God worked a miracle and got us there in July of 2003. It changed all of our lives. The minute I stepped out of the sliding doors into the airport, I was home. After this trip my dad really felt my family should move there, obviously this didn't happen. I guess if I were to tell the honest truth, I think it was God's perfect will for us to mover there. This was a very rough time for me. It was my freshman year of high school, and I just didn't want to be there. Thankfully, God grants grace and we were able to heal as a family. The following summer only strengthened my love of the 'singing nation'. Every trip held some kind of growth, of course. I have been at my lowest and highest there. One of the biggest blessings was having the opportunity to love on kids. Of all ages. My last trip I was given the opportunity to pray with a teenager that I had known for several years, and lead her to Christ. It was a huge blessing. I am so humbled to have been a part of God's work. The stories are virtually endless. Every year I would go in wary of the new team, and every year it was perfect. This summer I was not able to go to Latvia. I have know since November I wouldn't be. Joe and I were at our pre-marital counseling and the leader stressed the importance of the 'first year'. I remember he said, if you are really involved in something (even some kind of ministry) without your spouse, consider dropping it for the first year, and really focusing on your new ministry. Oh man that stung, but I knew. I knew I couldn't go. (I have never told anyone this before). It broke my heart. It is still breaking my heart. One of the most significant blessings from 8 years of travel/service with a lot of the same people, is they become your family. One of the hardest things is not knowing I have a Galina hug coming sometime soon. Galina is a women that has cooked for us, served with us, and loved on us. She is an amazing women. I wish I could adequately express how much I love everyone. Right now, two people are there from our church. They are great, great guys, but it is killing me to not be there. Whenever I get an update email, I cry. Whenever I see a picture, I cry. I have a small, constant ache. This may seem obsessive. I really am trusting God. I'm not depressed or anything, it's just I want to be there so badly. I can't really think about next summer yet. I'm not shutting the door. If it is God's will for me to be there, I will be. Here are a few pictures from our travels.

Milu, Milu.

2003: with Amy and Carrie. We have shared so many sweet, funny memories.

2003: With the Straume triplets!

2009: We were about to leave for the airport. I have watched these sweet girls grow up. I hated have to say goodbye, instead of see you next summer. They walked with their dad to tell us good bye. They drew pictures for me, the one that put me over the age was a picture of an angel, saying "May God guard your way". There was not a dry eye in the room. I was a bit emotional.

2009: We watched these boys grow up as well. They were so sweet, and unfortunately they seem to be lost in the word. Pray for them.

2009: This is sweet Galina. She has been through too much to say here, but she is faithful. This was one of the evenings when were all staying in Ziedkalne. We do this every trip. We live together, eat together et cetera. We become a family. Every night we would cry out to God together. It was amazing. To be completely open and accepting of each other. Too many times Christians are hardest on other Christians. Love people, love. (Ok, I'll get off my soap box). I am always so convicted because I don't know one Christian family that fervently cries out to God together. Including my own. When was the last time you cried out to God with someone? I hope I can learn to do this more.

2009: This is a perfect depiction of our time in Latvia. At the end of the day we always meet and eat together. We fellowship like we as Christians are meant to.

2008: This little guy is my buddy. His name is Vaidims. Pray for his salvation.

2008: My Ladies!! Every year we take pictures here.

2007: This is right after I got my tattoo, and right before Joe got his. It was too funny. My mom was all worried about it then. All crying and everything, & now she totally loves it. She thinks it's a great story. I nearly passed out, not from pain, but from just the fact I got a tattoo. I'm sure this comes as no surprise ;). The guy had to give me alcohol to sniff. Serving with Joe in Latvia has been my greatest joy, well almost. I would not have married him unless he felt called there as well.

2007: The greatest 4th of July ever! Ever! With the exception of 2008, this will be my first 4th of July in the States since 2003.

2005: Me and Carrie's Girls. How I love and miss them.

2005: Serving at the orphanage. I wanted to take them home. Joe and I are really thinking/praying about adopting from LV.

2004: She was in my VBS group. We still keep in touch. She is precious.

2004: My Mommo & Tetis. We are all our best selves there. We are truly our selves.

2004: This is one of my favorite pictures of my mom. She looks so happy and at peace. She is the most sacrificing person I know, and I have loved serving with her in Latvia. I'm so thankful to God she loves Latvia.

2006: Our feet look like this at the end of everyday. It's awesome. I love walking everywhere. I love that if I close my eyes I can see the courtyard at the church, walk out of the gate, turn left, then right, to go to the store. I love that I can smell it. I love how it looks and feels the same when you fly in. It feels like coming home.

'How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news...'