Peace I Give to You

Well the first week of class is under my belt, and I have to say I'm feeling pretty good. I am more motivated than ever before, and I'm taking the lightest load since my freshman year. Whew, I can breath... or not. Now that the anxiety of school has subsided, anxiety over the future has welcomed itself into the forefront of my thoughts. Unfortunately for most of my 'mature' life the need for control has been a real struggle for me. This struggle takes shape in many ways, and right now it's shape is: the city where we will be moving to in three months- THREE MONTHS! It is not in the so distant future anymore. Since applying for college, I have never felt more out of control. Needless to say, in my deepest thoughts I'm a wreck. My poor husband. I'm constantly showing him apartments/houses in various cities. I guess this is the only way I feel I can prepare. I love surprises, and when people ask me where we are going to head I usually respond- "I don't know, it's like a really big surprise". While I sound like I'm excited by this prospect, I am SO not! It's not even that I have a city in my head I want to end up in (ok maybe I do slightly) but I really do not care! I just want to know!!! Where we end up I totally trust God and believe he will provide a job in the right city, it is just the knowledge of that city that I desire so badly. Another trait of mine is the love of planning. I mean I really love it. I love researching, making lists, planning outfits, activities, class schedules... you name it, I love to plan it. I'm very much being deprived of this love right now. Joe and I have been encouraged by numerous pre-marriage counselors, mentors et cetera (if possible) to move somewhere besides Houston. This would provide us the opportunity to really depend on the Lord and each other and to become our own family. Ok... we are both pretty close to our families, but again I'm fine with being away for a while; however, I have to admit that today the idea of moving somewhere more then a two and a half hour plane ride away scares me a bit. Not only because of my 'slight' fear of flying, but also because it means we will come to Houston maybe twice a year. The left side of my brain finds this exciting and mysterious, but the right side... oh the right side finds this sad and terrifying. When I think about missing out on seeing our cousins Josh and Gabe, Oksana, Conner and Donavan, Ashlin grow up it makes me not want to go... Anyway this is way longer than I meant it to be, but I'm asking for you to go before the Father for us. If you are reading this you most likely know us quite well and care for us. I want so badly to be in the middle of God's will, and this means waiting on his timing. Pray that I would have peace beyond understanding and patience. This morning I have been surrounding myself with verses on peace, here are a few:

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. John 14:27

Blessed is the one who finds wisdom,

and the one who gets understanding,
for the gain from her is better than gain from silver
and her profit better than gold.
She is more precious than jewels,
and nothing you desire can compare with her.
Long life is in her right hand;
in her left hand are riches and honor.
Her ways are ways of pleasantness,
and all her paths are peace.

Proverbs 3:13-17

Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.

—Romans 5:1

And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.

—Colossians 3:15

As of right now, here are the cities we are looking into:

New York City: I guess our 1st choice

Washington D.C.
New Orleans
Boston

& Houston

Of course we are applying in other cities in Texas, but these are our "hopes and dreams" if you will & where we are going to apply at numerous companies. I thought it would be helpful if you knew what we are thinking. It is going to be a grand adventure. All we have to do is wait.